Apollo Leadership Meeting Preparation: “This is Water”
To kick off our exploration of bias, mental autocompletes, and the different ways that we see and experience the world, please read the two short sections below ("This is Water"/"The Water and D&B") and then consider the reflection questions at the bottom. Finally, enter your 3 words for our Word Cloud by November 12th EOD.
Excerpt from “This is Water” by David Foster Wallace
“There are these two young fish swimming along and they happen to meet an older fish swimming the other way, who nods at them and says ‘Morning, boys. How’s the water?’ And the two young fish swim on for a bit, and then eventually one of them looks over at the other and goes ‘What the hell is water?’
This is a standard requirement of US commencement speeches, the deployment of didactic little parable-ish stories. The story thing turns out to be one of the better, less bullshitty conventions of the genre, but if you’re worried that I plan to present myself here as the wise, older fish explaining what water is to you younger fish, please don’t be. I am not the wise old fish. The point of the fish story is merely that the most obvious, important realities are often the ones that are hardest to see and talk about.
— 2005 Commencement Speech at Kenyon College [Audio/transcript of the full speech]
“The Water” and Diversity & Belonging
In the context of our Diversity & Belonging work, “the water” represents the norms, biases, and invisible currents that shape our daily lives—often without us realizing it. For some of us, “the water” is less noticeable; for others, it can feel freezing or uncomfortable.
Here are a few examples of “the water” both in everyday life and at work:
In daily life, “the water” can be as simple as when a restaurant check is automatically handed to a man, implying he holds financial power. It can be how lighting in medical settings is less effective at detecting scars on darker skin, or how vehicle safety features weren’t designed with women’s bodies in mind. It’s also the expectation that men “tough it out,” or how fathers are praised for “baby-sitting” their own children when, for mothers, that’s simply considered parenting.
In the workplace, “the water” can show up in unspoken norms about appearance—for instance, how former First Lady Michelle Obama felt compelled to avoid wearing her natural hair due to societal expectations. It also shows up in how certain groups, like women and people of color, are disproportionately burdened with “service tasks.” “The water” might also include poor lighting for those with visual impairments, insufficient accommodations for hearing impairments in meetings, or communication norms or office setups that can be challenging for many neurodiverse individuals.
There are elements of “the water” that largely hold true across U.S. workplaces, but different environments also have their own “water,” perhaps in assumptions about religion, politics, or educational attainment. We also see “the water” in the relentless pace of U.S. workplace culture, or when we justify things with, “this is how we’ve always done things,” or dismiss problematic behaviors regularly with, “that’s just so-and-so being so-and-so; they didn’t mean any harm.”
It’s easy to acknowledge that “the water” exists, but much harder to see the full extent of how it affects us day-to-day—and even more difficult to candidly discuss, confront, and change it.
Before the Workshop: Reflection Questions & Three-Word Submission
Step One: Read through and think about the questions below.
In what ways does “the water” feel uncomfortable for you? Reflect on situations where the invisible norms or expectations around you felt restrictive, challenging, or harmful. This could be specific experiences or a general sense.
In what ways does “the water” feel comfortable for you? Reflect on moments when “the water” has felt natural or easy for you compared to others. How have the norms and systems supported your experience in ways you may not often think about or realize?
What might “the water” feel like for a colleague who is different from you? Put yourself in the shoes of a colleague with a different identity or background. How might the water feel uncomfortable or limiting for them?
Step Two - Submit Three Words for Our Word Cloud: Diversity & Belonging is not a neutral topic; we naturally have a range of emotions when reflecting upon and discussing these issues. Look at the emotions chart linked here, and reflect on what emotions came up for you while considering “the water” as it relates to Diversity & Belonging. Select three emotions and submit them anonymously before the session via this link or the QR code by November 12th EOD.
